The Dictionary and the truth (my truth)

Compassion: Actively sympathetic concern for the suffering of another : mercy. adj. compassionate.


Empathy: Identification with and understanding of the thoughts or feelings of another. adj. empathetic.


Doctor: A person trained and licensed to practice the healing arts, as medicine or surgery. A person holding the highest degree given by a university. To modify or alter for a desired end.



When I was doing some research for writing this blog, I ran across some things that were kind of surprising.



One of the things I found out was that Doctors no longer state the Hippocratic Oath when they become doctors, they haven't for a long time. I actually looked up the Oath and it's probably better that they don't abide by it, because it is so out dated and in some parts, just plain wrong. What surprised me the most was that no where in the Oath has there ever been the words "do no harm." I guess it's just one of those old wives tales that you hear about so often, that you just naturally believe is true. Oh, yeah and I saw it on TV, so it must be true, right?



The definition of doctor is interesting also, "a person trained and licensed to PRACTICE the HEALING ARTS. I have known and said that doctors are just "practicing." I have told many people this (because sometimes doctors need to be given a break they are not perfect, they are human and everyone makes mistakes) but maybe I should have been saying it to the doctors. More and more I am finding that it's the doctors who believe they never make mistakes, that they are hardly ever wrong and that they know better than the patient. Now I can hear it already...So let me say this before you delete this blog, I am not saying ALL doctors and I am not saying that they ALL fall into every point I just made, b.u.t. (behold the underlying truth) it is a larger percentage of doctors than I ever thought and I think it's sad.



I have worked my whole life different kinds of "alternative" stores and have had so many wonderful customers most dealing with devastating health issues themselves or with someone in their family. At the book stores I worked at, people researched alternative methods of healing everything from the laying on of hands, reflexology, acupuncture and energy work. At the health food store they research dietary changes, fasting, and supplements.



I have been a part of the medical world since I was about 9 years old, Stanford's Children's Hospital is where it started and I could not tell you how many doctors and specialists I have seen in the last 30 years. I know it's more than 50 and I hope it's less than 150. The sad thing is, is that I could count the number of great doctors on two hands. My definition of a great doctor is probably not what you think, it's not lofty, or perfection or having to be God like. It's someone who sees me more than the sum of my disease, who will sit by my bed (not rushed to get out of the room) and to give me the news, test results or diagnosis (good or bad). Someone who is not already thinking about the next patient they have to see, someone who is empathetic about how frustrating and scary it might be to wait for test results to come back. Someone who will listen to me about what I think might be going on (in my own body) instead of dismissing my opinion so they can get on with telling me what they know. Someone who is compassionate, not afraid to admit that they don't know all the answers, but are willing to understand or learn about something new.



Maybe laws need to be changed or contracts written up so doctors are not held liable when a patient wants to try some new drug or test or alternative medicine. I don't know what all the answers are to this problem. I am pretty sure that they need to teach doctors to be more compassionate and empathetic, because I am sure that every doctor has had someone in their family or a friend who has gone through the
medical system who can tell them what it's like to be a patient and how much better it could be if the patient were treated like a human being instead of a disease.

Time flies when your alive

I stole that title from a one man play that was on HBO years ago. I loved the show and always remembered the title. It was done by one of the lesser known actors on "CHiP's" (do you remember that show?) It was about he and his wife and their struggle when she was diagnosed with cancer. He spoke beautifully of her and how in the end she was surrounded by her family.
"Time flies when your alive"....Isn't it true though...it was supposed to be that all these electronics, computers, cell phones, and faster computers were supposed to give us more time, but it feels like we have even less. People are so distracted by all the technological toys, that there is no more silent time for us to think, figure out what we want, what we think. People talk on their cell phones in the car, the store, while they check their email...I really think most people are afraid to be by themselves (myself included). To hear what's going on in their own head. I remember a time when I would walk down the grocery store aisles and not hear a one sided conversation about someones personal life and what their friend thought they should do about it. Or looking at the car next to me on the road where everyone was on their cell phones (the baby had a toy cell phone, of coarse) instead of talking to each other. But hey....they are getting things done....
Well, the reason I started with that quote was because I thought it had been a few months since I had updated my blog....7 months......it's been 7 months...so much has happened since April. A couple hospital trips, lots of tests, more doctors, dislocated hip, an amazing fundraiser, my Mom met Stacy from "What not to Wear" (my favorite show on the planet), on the list & off the list and hopefully back on again soon, art, some art, no art, and starting over....waiting and waiting.
Today, I make the promise to myself to blog more often, it's good therapy to write it down, look back and see how I have been doing. That reminds me, I need to make an appointment with my therapist....it's been too long since I have seen her and she helps me to feel more grounded....I have said it before and I will say it again, I think everyone could use a good therapist!